It was Bernician Jason “Nilbog” Fischedick’s birthday last month, so I decided to surprise him with the worst birthday present ever.  What is that, you ask?  There are so many bad presents: hot dogs in a can, woolen underpants, nude pictures of Ronald Regan (the mature years).  But I found something that tops them all.  Scroll on, and find out:

“What’s with the face?”

Who could understand the anguish that this man is going through–the camera cannot even fully capture the pain on Jason’s face as he looks upon the novelization of the movie Kazaam  for the first time.

Jonathan Alexandratos looks on in horror.

I’m pretty sure all of this happened–photographs don’t lie, right?

Happy Birthday, Everyone!
– John Rice